Being a kid again


My wife's friend recently had a baby. They had one daughter and a new daughter was just born. According to my wife's friend, the newborn baby was "calmer" compared to her older sister. She could tell this by the way she sucked on her bottle. The older baby, when she was just born, would just suck the bottle nonstop like a machine! Apparently this new baby took slow, collected sips and would take breaks. Who knew babies personalities could be discerned with these seemingly little traits!

Then my wife said to me, "I don't think it's natural for a baby to be calm. I think babies and kids are naturally wild and crazy but oppression makes people like you and me calm". My wife and I both had very quiet childhoods because we had a relatively "crazier" sibling. We would be praised for our composure and were told we were "good" kids because we were calmer. Since a big part of a person's life coaching journey is reconnecting to your child self, what she said really resonated with me.

I imagined myself going crazy, perhaps on top of a sofa where I was told not to jump on - and having the time of my life without anyone telling me I can't. I imagined running around the house and not worrying about my parents to not do that (multistory apartments are common in Korea so kids aren't encouraged to run indoors) - something was very liberating to me inside.

Then I asked myself, why can't adults do that? The first instinctive answer that popped up was "well you're grown up now". That made me profoundly sad, made me almost shed a teardrop on my in-n-out cheeseburger.

The character Bing Bong in the Pixar film Inside Out tugged many people's heart strings. Bing Bong is wild, to the degree it cannot exist in the real world. It is everything Riley loves in her experience of life. What is your Bing Bong like? In the movie Riley had to part ways with Bing Bong as part of growing up and becoming an adolescent young adult. But I think that movie was way too pessimistic, and it enforces the agenda that people need to make compromises with their younger self in order to grow up.

I don't believe that to be true. Today, I ask you to unearth YOUR Bing Bong from your life. What does your Bing Bong look like? What does your Bing Bong wear, what sounds does it make? What are its favorite things to say, and how is your Bing Bong magical inside your world? Also what's your Bing Bong's name? As you unearth your Bing Bong, you will also notice a surge of voices telling you that you CAN'T, you SHOULDN'T revive this part of you. I want you to take note of those voices, and ask yourself: is this what you really believe? Or did you internalize what you heard from your parents, your teachers, your culture?

When you realize all those voices are coming from the OUTSIDE, try this to stop believing those limiting thoughts. Your childhood and your wildness, your fun nature must be celebrated, not shunned! Yeah, you might be loud and rowdy as a result but the world isn't a library. Yeah, you might go TOO hard and burn yourself but just like a child - there's nothing like a good meal and a warm nap can fix. Unleash the child inside of you. Be the nightmare for your authority figures. Go and in the best way possible, wreak havoc!

P.S.

Can't find your Bing Bong? Let's work together, I'll make sure that part of you is found and celebrated with you.

Hi! I'm Billy, your life coach.

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